Textbooks are such a bloody rip-off. No wonder no one reads.

Okay, so here's the frigging deal. I'm sitting in my history lecture last week, waiting for class to begin. As people are filing in, this young lady in front of me turns and looks at me, then has this moment of recognition. She says "Oh hey, I didn't know you went here" (i.e. U of T). Though she looks vaguely familiar I must confess that at that moment I had NO IDEA where I knew her from. I respond with something typical like "Yup, for the last four years, how are you doing, etc". We chit-chat some more I think (I was sort of tired that day) and I was also talking to the fellows next to me, two very casual acquaintances that I vaguely knew from some previous courses. She asked me if I would watch her computer for her during the break while she went out for a smoke. That's when it clicked in that she regularly came in to buy cigarettes from me at the old cigar shoppe. I must say that I was rather ashamed of myself to this point, seeing as she's something of a looker and to not have known who she was made me feel pretty dumb.

Fast forward to Friday, when lo and behold, she comes in to buy a pack of smokes! I actually do remember what her brand is, so I suppose that counts for something. I also surmise that she works somewhere in the mall, though I don't think I've ever established the location. This time I'm not so much of a jackass and ask something about what her major is and what year she's in. I also realize that I have no idea what her name is and introduce myself and she does likewise. So we're just chatting about classes and she mentions that she's taking a course that I had previously taken (Film Studies). I tell her that the prof is a good guy and casually mention that it's too bad I didn't know she was taking it sooner, I'd have sold her my old text book. She replies that she's actually not purchased it yet and would be keen on buying it from me. I say "Hey sure, I'll give it to you for really cheap if you want, it's barely been used, etc". She says that would be great. "I'll give you my number...and I guess my email too. Let me know" or something like that. I guess she had to go to work and that was that.

So my thing is this: Should I call her? Email regarding this book? Just bring it to class and be done with it? I know I have this habit of reading something into nothing. In fact, I don't even know how to continue with this post. Maybe I'm just so very desperate that I'm willing to think that some girl who wants a deal on an expensive text book has even the slightest interest in me.

Nevermind. Let's forget this post even happened.

They may not look it, but I'm sure everyone else here is happier than me

Once again I'm sitting in one of the libraries at school. Another week of this. I truly don't think I can take it. I mean leaving the house. It makes me beyond miserable. But then again so does staying in. So I suppose there is no solution. I have missed the street (veggie) dogs, but that's about it. For $2.50 it's a meal that can't be beat! But everything else I hate. The hot girls...uh, so many of them. Especially on a hot (32 degrees Celsius!) day like today when they're all wearing skirts...it's unbearable. I haven't been on a date since March and that was the worst date ever. I can't see any prospects for the future. I'm dying here. The reason I had such a miserable day on Saturday was for a similar reason, my interaction with the many surprisingly attractive young ladies who also happen to work at Rona Home and Garden. They were all laughing, having fun, planning their nights out...it was sheer torture. And so is this. I can be around hundreds of people and yet I am still so damned lonely. Every single minute of the day. Lord how I wish for friends and relationships just like everyone else has. But even thinking about it now and I have to pop an anxiety pill. Okay, a few random thoughts to take my mind off my life.

Fuck Kevin Spacey. Are there no actors in Hollywood that can be trusted anymore? You don't care for George Bush or his policies. Cool, fine, whatever. I respect that. But come January 2009, he will no longer be president! Remember that. The same can't be said for Mr. Chavez who is determined to make himself ruler for life, being the champion of all the poor in Venezuela. Guess what knuckleheads? The majority of Venezuelans will still be dirt poor in twenty years and Mr. Chavez's glorious socialist revolution will have achieved jack. Just look north to "Papa" Fidel (or whatever he calls him). So fuck off and stop cavorting with the enemy. And yes, he is our enemy. I really don't think that any half-sane person can disagree with that. Chavez may be totally loco but I would hope others have at least some sense. Support Hilary Clinton or Barack Obama or whoever. Encourage others to do so! That's A-OK with me. But what you're doing is only a few steps removed from treason. What's next, having dinner with Mahmoud Ahmadinejad?

I could comment on him but I don't really think it's even necessary. I will say that whereas it's hard to take Chavez seriously, at least he isn't a real threat. This dude is trying to build nuclear weapons. Let's start paying some real attention to this guy, okay? When the FRENCH are pushing for action you know something is wrong. But seriously, Nicolas Sarkozy might be the best Frenchman ever.

I suppose that's all for now. I have class in an hour and really should at least skim through the reading for it. Plus I might as well enjoy a cigar while the weather holds out. It's one of my very few sources of enjoyment...man my life is empty.

I can't even think of a witty title

Judging by the lack of response to my last few posts (and my hit counter) it doesn't seem like anyone is really reading this anymore. I know I've said it before, but I really might pull the plug on this thing. I think it's well written and worth reading, but if no one cares, what's the point? Sort of like how I used to think myself attractive, interesting, worthwhile, someone of substance and all that crap. But if no one else agrees it's not true. Otherwise you're just deluding yourself.

I just had a really lousy day today. Nothing earth shattering happened, just many more small things that further made me realize that there's very little reason for me to keep on going and that my life is so very empty. Switch places with me for a day and you'll want to blow your brains out, guaranteed. At least I have football to watch tomorrow. Maybe if I'm lucky I'll win a few bucks on Pro-Line. But don't count on it.

Yes Doc, that's pretty much how I feel 24/7

I think it's simply unreal that Roy Halladay doesn't have 20 wins by now. Just have a look at his stats this year. Half of his wins and no-decisions are games that, if he had a decent team backing him up, he should easily have had the 'W'. Yes he had a rough patch early on, but the guy was playing through appendicitis. He then came back from having his appendix removed in less than three weeks! Unreal.

Tonight I almost lost it. Two shoddy defensive plays by Aaron Hill (who was having a great game up until then) and the Yankees have four runs in the ninth. Incredible. I was thisclose to putting my remote through my nice LCD TV. So the game goes on an extra two hours and I also get no reading done as a result. Awesome. At least they won it in the 14th. Coupled with a BoSox win, this now puts the Yankees 2 1/2 back in the A.L. East. Gawd I hate the Yankees and what's more I hate their stinking fans even more. I can see if you live in New York. That I can live with. But the rest of them? A bunch of stinking posers. Where were they when the Yanks stunk in the 80s and early 90s? Probably sporting their now discarded Chicago Bulls gear.

Oh and while we're on baseball, I hope no one signs this jerk next year. Can you imagine fans in any other city cheering him? Then again if he hits the long ball, I suppose anyone might. Though it hasn't helped the Giants stay out of the cellar this year.

Now I'm off to bed. It's too humid right now, I didn't get any reading done and I have to work all day tomorrow. All I have to look forward to is a new episode of COPS. Yes, this is how sad my life is; this is how I spend my Saturday nights. It's why I often wish I was dead.

Craigslist hilarity

Though I really do love the fact that I was able to sell my old car through Craigslist (coincidentally where I bought my new one as well) I do often times find it pretty funny. Sometimes it's a bitch replying to what looks like a legitimate inquiry on your item which you soon discover is just some scammer. Someone even left me a message ON MY PHONE from somewhere in Illinois. Yes, someone from Illinois would really want to buy my piece of shit 1988 Volvo. Hilarious. Here are a couple of actual emails that I received from "people" who were "interested" in buying my "item".

*************************************************************************

Hello Good Day

Thank for your message. I am very grateful to read from you..

I understand your message. The total amount for your {Merchandise} is $250.00+ $50.00 for removing the advert from , And my client is resposible for the payment that is why I ask for your information. A check of $150.00 will be issued out to you. Please as soon as you got the check and get it cashed, You were to deduct the whole amount of this transaction and send the rest balance to my shipper company. You don't have to worry about the shipment since they will handle everything as soon as the wire has been made to them via Western Union Money Transfer.Please kindly respond back and confirmed with this follows information.

Full Name:
Address:
City, State, Zipcode:
Cell Phone #:
Home Phone #:

So that payment can be made out to you first thing tomorrow morning.

Regards.
Shawn

*************************************************************************

Huh?

And then there was this one:

*************************************************************************

Hello,

I am interested in your advertised item and would need to know your last asking price for it.I would need you to furnish me with informations regarding the
present condition of the item and would like you to send me pictures.I would be making payment via Check/Money Order and would want to know if that is ok
with you.I want you to let me have your payment details such as your name,address and phone number so that I can have payment mailed out to you.

Get back to me so that we can conclude this sale on time.

Regards

Bryan meadows

*************************************************************************

Unreal. But not only did I manage to sell my vehicle without paying a single cent on a classified ad, I also got to wade through endlessly amusing letters such as these!

Musings as I'm trying to kill three hours in between classes

Two hours ain't actually that much. I have a little bit that I should be reading, though amazingly enough I've yet to fall behind! Yes I'm only a week in but that means little. I'm usually already trying to catch up. And I suppose that I should take advantage of the last vestiges of warm summer weather and perhaps enjoy a cigar as I read somewhere under a tree. But a few things have been on my mind.

I really don't understand how people can actually prefer Leno over Letterman. I haven't checked on this in ages, but the last I can recall, Leno's show consistently beats Dave in the ratings. Are people retarded? Jay Leno seems like a very nice fellow and all, but give me a break. These two aren't even in the same ballpark. And no, Conan O'Brien isn't really that much better. Jon Stewart maybe too liberal for my liking, but at least he's a funny guy. Though having him host the Oscars again? Yikes. Sorry but he bombed big time in 2006. I don't know what they're thinking there.

On a loosely related note, I was watching The Late Show about a week ago and caught Jodie Foster on it. Man, she looked pretty hot, I must say! Too bad she's a lesbo though. And Katherine Heigl at the otherwise useless Emmy Awards? Funny and totally hot.

Something I find very typical of liberals is their total unwillingness to accept those who have views at all divergent of their own. But it's nothing new, so I shouldn't be surprised. And the only thing "dangerous and offensive" here is that Barry Manilow is actually still making records. Which means that someone out there must be buying them!

Why is O.J even still alive? I mean why hasn't someone who perhaps wants to kill them self not just do the world and take this guy out first? If I lived anywhere near him, I'd make it my daily ritual to piss in a cup and throw it at him every day until he couldn't take it anymore and blew his brains out. Why don't people do stuff like this? People still worship him and play golf with him and consider him some sort of victim and even pray for him! These people deserve almost as little regard as O.J. himself. Christ, even if this is a trumped up charge, lock him up and get rid of him. I can hardly think of a more despicable human being.

Okay, that's enough. I have some more, but I'll save it for next time. Mostly on how there are so many gorgeous girls all around me and it makes me wish I was dead. But for now I've decided on my favorite meditative place on the entire campus for my cigar. If anyone knows it, it's on the east side of campus, this little sort of courtyard bordered by Isabel Bader Theatre to the north, Northrop Frye Hall to the south, Emmanuel College to the west and Victoria College to the east. There's this nice tree to sit under and the ivy growing on the walls of EC is rather tranquil. I've missed this spot, having had pretty much all my classes on the west or 'Asian' (don't ask) side of campus all of last year. For a few brief moments it makes me forget just how much I hate U of T.

Posting (and drinking) when I should be reading

It's over done and gone. Went back to school (last year) on Monday. Therefore the last summer of my life is over. And I totally wasted it. For instance, I had the entire Labour Day long weekend off, but I spent it as I did pretty much the entire summer: at home, alone. Did some minor cleaning and yard work around the house. That was pretty much it. Pretty much all I did all summer (when I wasn't working). The last time I left the house to do anything of a social nature? July 22. The Police concert. That's close to two months ago. No lie. And holy God is that sad. Okay, Marty Boy dropped over to watch football on Sunday. But that barely counts as any sort of social activity. I know that I've never had an amazing social life, but I really do think I'm scraping rock bottom here. And yet I don't think that necessarily means I have nowhere to go but up.

Did finally purchase a new (old) car a couple of weeks ago. I settled on a 2000 Pontiac Grand Am, on which I think I got a pretty good deal. That is if nothing goes wrong with it in the next month or two. Anyways it's a pretty nice car and I'm rather happy with my purchase. I've included a couple of photos of it. This finally means the end of the line for my old Volvo. I really do have to get rid of her, seeing as I have nowhere to park the thing. I'm willing to entertain any and every offer that comes my way. Even though it's a piece shit I will be sort of sad to see her go. Despite it all the car always started on me and got me where I needed to go. Here are some crappy pictures of the new thing (which I've yet to name).

























Nothing gets me more depressed than attractive women. Okay, I'm sure there are other things. But it's surely one of them. I was at work the other day (cigar store) and was coming in from not having a cigarette (I seem to have inadvertently quit smoking) and as I look back, I see these two gorgeous young ladies having a smoke break. Now I've seen them around before and am pretty sure they work somewhere in the mall. I can't recall where though. It's not important. I don't even know where I'm going with this. All I know is that I became seriously more miserable after seeing them. Something about never being able to be with anyone who looks like that or some similar shit. Or not having anything. I don't know. And now being in an environment in which there are many, many attractive young ladies, not to mention people with friends and such? This is why I drink people. This is why I drink.

Okay, I should have posted this two days ago...

If by "painful" they mean outstanding and by "god-awful" they mean as hot as ever, then I agree! Why is everyone so filled with jealousy? Why is everyone out to get Britney? Why can't they just accept the fact that everything she does is amazing? Why?

Yes, I know I'm sick. But I still find her so hot. She could kick her head back (losing her wig in the process), proceed to throw up on stage and then fall all over it and I'd still have the hots for her. I need help.

WARNING!! This post actually does contain nudity. No, not of me thankfully.

Remember what I wrote about Serena Williams a few months back? That goes double now. Not an ounce of class to be found in her body. And it's such a shame, because she really is a fine player, someone you would want to cheer for. But how can you? I guess Justine was lucky when she beat Serena's sister tonight as well. For some reason it also makes me think of Barry Bonds and how I might be willing to give him the benefit of the doubt if he were even a half-decent fellow instead of the totally self-righteous jerk that he is. Like how this whole Rick Ankiel thing has me sort of upset. I don't really know if he's a jerk or not (I don't know much about him either way) but just his story was so awesome to follow. Which is why I'm still sort of rooting for him, hoping it's not true (though it likely is). But if he turns out to be an ass like Barry, be sure that I'll turn quite quickly. Shame to see this soured already though.

If you live in Canada, tune into CTV Newsnet, I think between like 6-10 PM. The anchorwoman they have on at that time? Seriously hot. I forget her name. I know that's it's double M something. Whatever, it's not that crucial. Hot.

I am so glad to have football back though. I will now have something to accompany my beer drinking on Sundays. Peyton and the Colts looked quite impressive against a good New Orleans team last night. But go Pats! My former allegiance to the Giants seems to be fading as fast as Tiki's. I'll miss him as he was my favourite player on the team. Well, perhaps next to crazy, crazy Jeremy Shockey. But only because he's a total psycho. When he called Bill Parcells a 'homo'? Priceless.

Osama Bin Laden is releasing a new video or some shit like that. Is he alive, is he dead? Will he ever be caught? Who cares. He's totally irrelevant and has been for the last five years. Sure it would be great to catch or kill the guy. But if he is alive, the little chicken-shit is living in some cave somewhere, sleeping on rocks and pissing in a bucket. The best thing that the media could do is not to air his useless tape and not give this guy any more credence. I'm not even going to post a link.

I want an iPod Touch. I've been waiting for eons for this product to come out. I heard a few weeks ago that they were finally going to announce it. So why am I not rushing out to pick one up? Well, the fact that the storage capacity for the top model is only 16 gigs is pretty much it. 16 gigs? You have to be joking. That will barely cover my music collection. And the battery life seems decent enough, but not when you compare that to the up to 40 hours (!!) of what they now call the iPod Classic, it's simply okay. Gimme an iPod touch with 30 plus hours and something like an 80 gig storage capacity and I'll not only rush out to buy it, I'll also suck Steve Jobs' balls for him.

Earlier was listening to one of my Pavarotti CDs. What a voice, I tells ya. Sad to see him go, but 71 is a pretty good age. Dude was FAT after all and I'm surprised he lasted this long. Truly one of the all time greats. At least now he'll lose some weight! Sorry, that was mean. Seriously, he was awesome though.

Finally, the only thing that Vanessa Hudgens should apologize for is not showing her goodies sooner. Seeing as we the public own all public figures, naked photos of all of them should be available on demand and it should be up to us to decide which ones we want to view. Okay, now I’m really starting to lose it. Here's the nudity I promised though!

Perhaps if this improves my hit counter, I'll make nudity a semi-regular thing here. Start sending in your photos folks!

Still drunk and still posting!

Truth be told, I really do enjoy posting stuff. I have lots of opinions and sometimes (when I've had a few drinks) feel like sharing them with the handful of people who read this.

Is Nicolas Sarkozy the first decent Frenchman since de Gaulle? Granted, I like many things that come out of France (the wine, the cheese and pretty much every cologne that I wear) but like pretty much every anglophile, do not care much for the French themselves. This guy may be different. We shall see.

Also it pains me to not support John McCain any longer. I really would love to see him be President more than anyone else. But it just ain't gonna happen. Sure I'd still support him if he somehow won the nomination, but I really do think that Mitt and especially FDT are more electable. In fact, I think that would make for a great ticket (Thompson/Romney) right there. Sometimes one has to bend his principles a little in order to back a winner. Realistically Rudy is probably the strongest of them all but for now I just can't endorse the guy based on my own ideology. But if it comes down to him and Hilary I will be singing a different tune for sure.

Hi, stop defending this sack of shit, people. You had a good run Whoopi. You even won an Oscar for God's sake. But now your career is over. Let go, move some place nice, make a few investments and stop pretending that you have anything important to say.

Finally this has been a colossally disappointing season. Injuries hit the Jays very hard early in the year and despite some nice surprised from young pitchers, this will be yet another third place finish. The offense woefully underachieved all year long and with the exception of Matt Stairs (and maybe Frank Thomas, though not at that salary), all of J.P. Ricciardi's off season moves have been busts. Please fire him now. His 'five year rebuilding plan' is on its seventh year I think. I guess I can seek some solace in the fact that it appears as if the Yankees streak of winning the AL East is finally over. Hopefully they also miss the playoffs.

Okay, now I'm really too drunk to go on. Perhaps I'll go watch a movie or something. Either I'll grab something from the old DVD collection or see if there are any decent pornos on TMN tonight. Probably not, but that likely won't stop me.

Is my complaining what Al Gore envisioned when he invented the internet?

I was going to attempt to post something, but now I'm too drunk. What a surprise. Also, I'm very tired all the time. Like I'll come home from work or whatever and I am just beat. I take a nap which I hope will last an hour but then I hit the snooze like seven times or whatever and it turns into three hours later. I find myself always, always tired. Even after a normal (seven or eight hours) night's sleep I can't stay awake. Is this part of some larger medical condition? Perhaps. And then the nap often ruins my night sleep. So I have to take some sort of sleep aid. God I'm tired as we speak. And I need another drink.