Thursday, March 20, 2008

I sorta miss the Cold War

During my recent research on the Cold War, I stumbled upon something I found to be rather remarkable. For some reason (don't ask why or how) I got to looking at a list of the biggest lakes in the world. Let me just stop here that I think it is beyond stupid that they now classify Michigan and Huron as one lake. Idiocy. Like declassifying Pluto as a planet.

But I digress.

Way down at number 15 was the Aral Sea in the former U.S.S.R. Now I seem to remember always looking at old almanacs and such when I was a kid, I always liked geography. I seemed to remember it being quite bigger than that! Well, it was. MUCH bigger. Due to colossally ill-conceived irrigation project on the part of the Soviets, the Aral Sea, which had a surface area of 68,000 Square km in 1960, now has an area of 17,000 Sq. Km!! For proof that the Soviets really and truly were incompetent, one needn't look any farther than here. Ugh.

This somehow also reminded me of Ronald Reagan's favorite Soviet joke.

Man in the Soviet Union works long and hard for many years. It's long been his dream to own a car. So eventually he saves up the money and goes down to the Lada dealership. He plunks down his pile of rubles and tells the man working there that he wants to buy a car. The dealer tells him "Okay, but you do realize there's a ten year wait, right?" The man says, "Fine, fine I just want to get my car". So he fills out all the requisite forms and paperwork and when he's finally finishes the dealer tells him to come back in exactly ten years and his car will be ready. As he's about to leave, the man asks if he should come in the morning or afternoon. Incredulous, the car dealer looks at him and says "It's ten years from now! What difference does it make?!" To which the man replies, "Well, the plumber is coming in the morning".

Hi-larious. Anyways, that's it from me for now. I have a bit of a reprieve from essay writing, though not much. I'm also thoroughly depressed (again), this time over the fact that there are just so many really good looking girls at U of T. It does me no good because none of them want me or anything to do with me. And now I'm pretty much done. And I've wasted my time there, like I wasted going to an arts high school with a girl-guy ratio of like 3-1. This is why I drink, why I am drinking right now.


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